CD3

So, it's been a while since I've done any fertility anythings, but it's time again.

I just finished 5 months of birth control and metformin and kicking my own ass with killer workouts and such.  I went in for an ultrasound last week and I got the go-ahead for a medicated cycle.  I start letrozole tonight, which is cd3, and continue through cd7.  I have to call the nurse and get scheduled in for an ultrasound. 

To be very blunt, I'm totally scared shitless to do this all over again.  In the weeks leading up to my ultrasound, I've had several very quiet, sometimes overly-emotional days.  I feel all unstable and crazy.  It's so bazaare starting all this again.  I think before, I was at a point where I was just going through the motions, because I've done it so many times.  Since taking a break, I almost feel more emotionally invested this time.  Not only that, I have worked my ass off to get my body healthier.  I just need to remember to keep the faith and let myself be hopeful.  That leaves me more open to get hurt when/if it doesn't work...but I'd rather that than feel like a robot through all of it without any hope of it working.

Thank God for my husband, family and my best friends.  I don't think I could do it without the support system I have now.  I'm definitely going to need them in a big way this time around!